Last night Lia and I were snuggling before bed. These are precious moments for me, she usually doesn't sit still long enough for us to snuggle for more than a few minutes. Last night she was calm, snugly and so tender. Oh, how it made my heart full and glad. We were sitting quietly, listening to music when she asked,
"Mom, how do babies get out of the Mommy's tummy?"
With Zach, I remember saying, "let's talk about this later." I remember that moment like it happened yesterday. We were driving down Stadium Blvd in Columbia, he was in his car seat and at the moment I didn't know how I should answer him so I re-directed our conversation. He was satisfied with talking about it later but last night, I knew Lia wouldn't go for later.
I sat quietly for a few moments and then answered her as best I could--she likes details so as simply as I could, I gave details. What followed my answer surprised me, it took my breath away for a second or two.
"That's what my Mommy in China did too. I don't remember it though. She was my "real" Mommy and then you came to China and now your my "real" Mommy."
I didn't really know what to say. She's never said that before. We've talked about "birth mom", "China Mom" but she's never said, "real".
I am her real Mom. I am Lia's Mom. Always and Forever.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
what are we in store for . . .
Lia informed us that she has a "boyfriend." Excuse me? Well, not just one boyfriend, four to be exact. Han Sol, Te Houn, Jordan A and Michael. She hasn't mentioned Michael for awhile (he was our neighbor in KC). She said, "Mom, I'm starting to forget what he looks like."
Todd said that he had a talk with her because she let one of the boys that's in her class hug her. We tried not to react too much but also explained that she was very special and she shouldn't let the boys hug or KISS her. Her response:
"It's alright if I have four. It's what I want. I'm only going to marry Jordan A."
Please pray. Where does she come up with this stuff. :-)
Todd said that he had a talk with her because she let one of the boys that's in her class hug her. We tried not to react too much but also explained that she was very special and she shouldn't let the boys hug or KISS her. Her response:
"It's alright if I have four. It's what I want. I'm only going to marry Jordan A."
Please pray. Where does she come up with this stuff. :-)
Monday, November 23, 2009
Holidays
It's a bit strange to live in a foreign land during the holidays. You can almost feel like they don't exist and well, they really don't in South Korea.
Thanksgiving of course is Thursday and well, no one in Korea is celebrating with turkey and all the fixins. But among all of us expat's, there is a buzz and a quest to find all of our traditional Thanksgiving Day foods.
Todd and the kids are off school Thursday and Friday. Since the school follows a Western schedule, they honor our Thanksgiving Break. We're all pretty excited. Most of our friends aren't off so we will be celebrating Saturday. It's going to be interesting and exciting to gather 25 plus people in our apartment. Our day is going to begin with a football game at Seohyeon Park. Because no one has a proper kitchen, we all must cook at different locations and then bring it together at our place. It's going to be awesome--a Thanksgiving I'm sure we'll never forget.
Christmas . . . I can't believe it's just around the corner. Christmas is not celebrated by most Koreans. There are a few stores that are carrying beautiful ornaments and decorations but for the most part, you could feel like Christmas isn't coming. I asked some friends what they do for Christmas--curious how they would celebrate. They said they give "a" gift to the children in the family and go out for dinner. That's it. I like it. Christians of course celebrate Christ and attend a Christmas service but for the most part, it's another day.
I must admit that I'm sad that all of our ornaments are packed away in a storage unit. We are on the search for a Christmas tree--that won't cost a fortune! I'm sure this will be a Christmas we won't forget. It will be special and a bit sad . . . mostly special though because we will be together, creating something new and memories that we will never forget.
Thankful.
Thanksgiving of course is Thursday and well, no one in Korea is celebrating with turkey and all the fixins. But among all of us expat's, there is a buzz and a quest to find all of our traditional Thanksgiving Day foods.
Todd and the kids are off school Thursday and Friday. Since the school follows a Western schedule, they honor our Thanksgiving Break. We're all pretty excited. Most of our friends aren't off so we will be celebrating Saturday. It's going to be interesting and exciting to gather 25 plus people in our apartment. Our day is going to begin with a football game at Seohyeon Park. Because no one has a proper kitchen, we all must cook at different locations and then bring it together at our place. It's going to be awesome--a Thanksgiving I'm sure we'll never forget.
Christmas . . . I can't believe it's just around the corner. Christmas is not celebrated by most Koreans. There are a few stores that are carrying beautiful ornaments and decorations but for the most part, you could feel like Christmas isn't coming. I asked some friends what they do for Christmas--curious how they would celebrate. They said they give "a" gift to the children in the family and go out for dinner. That's it. I like it. Christians of course celebrate Christ and attend a Christmas service but for the most part, it's another day.
I must admit that I'm sad that all of our ornaments are packed away in a storage unit. We are on the search for a Christmas tree--that won't cost a fortune! I'm sure this will be a Christmas we won't forget. It will be special and a bit sad . . . mostly special though because we will be together, creating something new and memories that we will never forget.
Thankful.
Thursday, November 19, 2009
three months, really?
I sent the following post as a prayer update to friends. I then thought, I should post this on the blog. It's rather long but hopefully, it gives you a sense of our full lives here in South Korea.
"Wow! Life has sure gotten full in three months!" This is what Todd said to me this morning as he left for work. It's so true! I think we were both under the assumption that we would have a lot of time in Korea. In three months, life has become full!
On one hand, our lives here seem so normal and then we're reminded that it's not normal at all . . . we live in Korea! There are days that are challenging and frustrating, days when we feel like we don't really "like Korea" and long for what is familiar and comfortable. We have so much to learn about Korea, it's culture and people. It's helpful to stay in this place of learning and discovery. Not always but most of the time, when we take frustrating moments to learn and discover, the situation is diffused and doesn't seem so overwhelming--laughing also helps!
Here is a little snapshot of what we're up to and areas that we would so value your prayers.
1. Todd is a very busy teacher! He enjoys teaching and the relationships that he's building with the students. He asked for prayer to have wisdom in teaching, to effectively communicate with the students and in all of his preparations. He is teaching 5 different courses and this requires a lot of planning. He works most evenings when the kids go to bed, grading papers, writing lesson plans and preparing for his classes. He's tired!
2. Todd is also leading a prayer group with the students. The students want to pray. Some of them aren't Christians but they come because they know it's "good" and want to be part. Todd is praying for God to meet with these students. Prayer is more like an obligation and they don't know about having a relationship with Christ and hearing his voice. Along with that, Todd would love to have you pray for his 9th and 10th grade Bible class. They are studying the gospels. Most of the kids have a very religious view of Christianity, this has given Todd wonderful opportunity to share the "gospel" with the kids. Todd really believes God wants to break through in these kids lives! Many of them are under a lot of pressure academically and are very lonely.
3. Lia-Joy. It's been wonderful for us to see Lia flourishing here. Lia was suppose to start Kindergarten this fall. Due to here English abilities they have put her in 1st grade. The work is 1st grade work! Although this is challenging she is working very hard and enjoys school very much. Please pray for continued peace over her heart--we've been so thankful for how well she's done here. She loves looking like everyone and comments often about how great that is! :-) Two of Lia's closet friends at school will not be there next semester. Please pray for this adjustment--she's going to miss them a lot--she doesn't know yet that this is going to happen.
4. Zach. First, thank you for all your prayers for Zach. We believe they are making a difference. We still ride waves of frustration but Zach is doing well. School is always challenging for Zach and the added pressure of cultural differences is difficult. Please pray that Zach has strength, motivation to do well and most of all an awareness of God's peace. He has had some really tender moments when we've talked about relationship with Jesus. Through all of his frustrations, it seems that God is graciously drawing Zach to Himself. Zach has made some good friends and has got involved with the youth club from church--Praise God!!
5. Thursday Nights. About a month ago we started gathering with a small group of friends that we've met here to worship, pray and wait on God together. We share a meal together and then worship and wait. These times have been incredible. Really, it's been amazing how God has met with us during our gatherings. Please pray that we continue to hear God's heart for South Korea and how we are to better serve and see His Kingdom come in this land.
6. Kim (me). I've been sick for about 4 weeks. I'm better but not 100%--maybe like 65%. Thursday mornings I've begun to gather with some really great girls for prayer and to read the scriptures together. I love these times and really feel that God has orchestrated these relationships. Each of these girls recently graduated from college, have moved to SK and are teaching English. I'm telling you, God is up to something here! I'm also starting to participate in English conversation with Korean woman who are taking the Boundaries class. After the class, they have lunch together, fellowship and continue discussion. They love to practice English and are very hungry for more of Jesus.
The school has offered me a part time position as the school librarian. I have mixed emotions about this but feel I should give it a trial run to see how it goes. They will assist in our transportation to school and other benefits (and pay) and I will work about 20 hours a week. There is a lot involved in this and I would ask for prayer to have strength, to exude the presence of Jesus and to build relationship with the Korean staff at the school.
7. Housing. The apartment we live in is in a wonderful location. Though it's a bit cramped, we like it for the most part. That said, winter is quickly approaching and it's COLD! We were told by the previous tenants that the utilities are outrageous--they even suggested that the school not use this apartment again but in a scramble they just gave it to us. We are a bit stressed about what this is going to look like financially. We are pursuing the possibility of moving to a better location/home. I won't even go into the details of what this involves but it's challenging--culturally it's very challenging on so many levels. Please pray for wisdom, humility and understanding--most of all love! as we communicate with the school.
Our Father who art in Heaven
Hallowed be Your Name
Your Kingdom Come, Your Will be done,
On earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day, our daily bread
Forgive us our trespasses
as we forgive those who trespass against us
Lead us not into temptation and
deliver us from evil
For Thine is the Kingdom, and the Glory
and the Power, Forever and Ever.
Amen.
"Wow! Life has sure gotten full in three months!" This is what Todd said to me this morning as he left for work. It's so true! I think we were both under the assumption that we would have a lot of time in Korea. In three months, life has become full!
On one hand, our lives here seem so normal and then we're reminded that it's not normal at all . . . we live in Korea! There are days that are challenging and frustrating, days when we feel like we don't really "like Korea" and long for what is familiar and comfortable. We have so much to learn about Korea, it's culture and people. It's helpful to stay in this place of learning and discovery. Not always but most of the time, when we take frustrating moments to learn and discover, the situation is diffused and doesn't seem so overwhelming--laughing also helps!
Here is a little snapshot of what we're up to and areas that we would so value your prayers.
1. Todd is a very busy teacher! He enjoys teaching and the relationships that he's building with the students. He asked for prayer to have wisdom in teaching, to effectively communicate with the students and in all of his preparations. He is teaching 5 different courses and this requires a lot of planning. He works most evenings when the kids go to bed, grading papers, writing lesson plans and preparing for his classes. He's tired!
2. Todd is also leading a prayer group with the students. The students want to pray. Some of them aren't Christians but they come because they know it's "good" and want to be part. Todd is praying for God to meet with these students. Prayer is more like an obligation and they don't know about having a relationship with Christ and hearing his voice. Along with that, Todd would love to have you pray for his 9th and 10th grade Bible class. They are studying the gospels. Most of the kids have a very religious view of Christianity, this has given Todd wonderful opportunity to share the "gospel" with the kids. Todd really believes God wants to break through in these kids lives! Many of them are under a lot of pressure academically and are very lonely.
3. Lia-Joy. It's been wonderful for us to see Lia flourishing here. Lia was suppose to start Kindergarten this fall. Due to here English abilities they have put her in 1st grade. The work is 1st grade work! Although this is challenging she is working very hard and enjoys school very much. Please pray for continued peace over her heart--we've been so thankful for how well she's done here. She loves looking like everyone and comments often about how great that is! :-) Two of Lia's closet friends at school will not be there next semester. Please pray for this adjustment--she's going to miss them a lot--she doesn't know yet that this is going to happen.
4. Zach. First, thank you for all your prayers for Zach. We believe they are making a difference. We still ride waves of frustration but Zach is doing well. School is always challenging for Zach and the added pressure of cultural differences is difficult. Please pray that Zach has strength, motivation to do well and most of all an awareness of God's peace. He has had some really tender moments when we've talked about relationship with Jesus. Through all of his frustrations, it seems that God is graciously drawing Zach to Himself. Zach has made some good friends and has got involved with the youth club from church--Praise God!!
5. Thursday Nights. About a month ago we started gathering with a small group of friends that we've met here to worship, pray and wait on God together. We share a meal together and then worship and wait. These times have been incredible. Really, it's been amazing how God has met with us during our gatherings. Please pray that we continue to hear God's heart for South Korea and how we are to better serve and see His Kingdom come in this land.
6. Kim (me). I've been sick for about 4 weeks. I'm better but not 100%--maybe like 65%. Thursday mornings I've begun to gather with some really great girls for prayer and to read the scriptures together. I love these times and really feel that God has orchestrated these relationships. Each of these girls recently graduated from college, have moved to SK and are teaching English. I'm telling you, God is up to something here! I'm also starting to participate in English conversation with Korean woman who are taking the Boundaries class. After the class, they have lunch together, fellowship and continue discussion. They love to practice English and are very hungry for more of Jesus.
The school has offered me a part time position as the school librarian. I have mixed emotions about this but feel I should give it a trial run to see how it goes. They will assist in our transportation to school and other benefits (and pay) and I will work about 20 hours a week. There is a lot involved in this and I would ask for prayer to have strength, to exude the presence of Jesus and to build relationship with the Korean staff at the school.
7. Housing. The apartment we live in is in a wonderful location. Though it's a bit cramped, we like it for the most part. That said, winter is quickly approaching and it's COLD! We were told by the previous tenants that the utilities are outrageous--they even suggested that the school not use this apartment again but in a scramble they just gave it to us. We are a bit stressed about what this is going to look like financially. We are pursuing the possibility of moving to a better location/home. I won't even go into the details of what this involves but it's challenging--culturally it's very challenging on so many levels. Please pray for wisdom, humility and understanding--most of all love! as we communicate with the school.
Our Father who art in Heaven
Hallowed be Your Name
Your Kingdom Come, Your Will be done,
On earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day, our daily bread
Forgive us our trespasses
as we forgive those who trespass against us
Lead us not into temptation and
deliver us from evil
For Thine is the Kingdom, and the Glory
and the Power, Forever and Ever.
Amen.
Friday, November 13, 2009
youth club
The church we have been part of here has a youth club that meets Friday nights at Mosaic, a cafe near our apartment. Todd and Zach have been going for the last few weeks. Zach has a lot of fun and has made some great connections with other kids. Amanda, the leader of the youth group, is full of energy, engages so well with the kids and has given Zach something to look forward to each week.
Tonight the kids had a treasure hunt. There were four teams. Each team had to find 8 clues to the treasure. The clues were hidden in businesses around Mosaic. It was great fun and wore all the kids out!!
While the kids were out searching for their clues, I was hanging out with two other Mom's at the cafe. Ji Yeon and Sunny. I speak basically no Korean but they knew some English. Somehow we managed to talk--me with my cell phone and them going back in their minds to when they learned English in middle school. Yes, I did say my cell phone. There is a feature on my phone where I can type in a word and it gives me the Korean word and definition. So, when we were stuck, I typed in my word, showed them the word and then we would continue on in our fragmented but warm conversation.
I don't know why but these moments energize me. It's difficult and a bit tiring but mostly I feel energized by the encounter.
We exchanged phone numbers and e-mail addresses. I hope to spend more time with them. Ji Yeon and Sunny desire to learn English and I desire to learn Korean--we're a perfect trio! Before we left they said, "we come tonight so that we can meet you." "Ne" was my reply. Yes, that's probably true.
I got Ji Yeon and Sunny to play some Mario Cart on the Wii with me. It was hilarious. Basically, we just giggled and felt very silly. Their kids laughed when they came back and saw them playing. I was ready to play a few more games but they were done.
Zach and Lia in their winter uniforms.
Tonight the kids had a treasure hunt. There were four teams. Each team had to find 8 clues to the treasure. The clues were hidden in businesses around Mosaic. It was great fun and wore all the kids out!!
While the kids were out searching for their clues, I was hanging out with two other Mom's at the cafe. Ji Yeon and Sunny. I speak basically no Korean but they knew some English. Somehow we managed to talk--me with my cell phone and them going back in their minds to when they learned English in middle school. Yes, I did say my cell phone. There is a feature on my phone where I can type in a word and it gives me the Korean word and definition. So, when we were stuck, I typed in my word, showed them the word and then we would continue on in our fragmented but warm conversation.
I don't know why but these moments energize me. It's difficult and a bit tiring but mostly I feel energized by the encounter.
We exchanged phone numbers and e-mail addresses. I hope to spend more time with them. Ji Yeon and Sunny desire to learn English and I desire to learn Korean--we're a perfect trio! Before we left they said, "we come tonight so that we can meet you." "Ne" was my reply. Yes, that's probably true.
I got Ji Yeon and Sunny to play some Mario Cart on the Wii with me. It was hilarious. Basically, we just giggled and felt very silly. Their kids laughed when they came back and saw them playing. I was ready to play a few more games but they were done.
Zach and Lia in their winter uniforms.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
gold dust
15 years ago, a friend gave Todd gold shavings that came from a part that was being made for one of the space shuttles. This little vile of gold dust has laid in his top dresser drawer for the last 15 years. Before we left for Korea, Todd asked our super cool friend, Dan, who happens to be a jeweler, if he could do something with it. Because Dan is super cool and a total rock star, he did something beautiful with that gold dust. Our friend, Ryan, is the genius behind the video camera!!
Check this out!
Check this out!
Sunday, November 8, 2009
on her way to mexico
Lia was upset tonight that she had to go to bed. She kept insisting that she didn't need sleep. She also insisted that she should stay awake to insure that she wouldn't be late for school Monday morning and receive a tardy.
Todd told her if she got out of bed again she would get a spanking. This news sparked more frustration and she decided that she would just run away. She started gathering all of her "special" things, wrapped them up in a blanket and headed to the front door. It went like this:
Lia: I'm leaving this place.
Todd: Lia, you need to get back in your bed.
Lia: I'm leaving. You're not my dad. I'm going to Mexico
Todd: I would be really sad if you went to Mexico.
Lia: Well, I wouldn't be sad.
I then joined Todd in getting Lia to bed.
Me: Lia, it's time to sleep--you are very tired.
Lia: I'm not going to sleep all night.
I picked her up, carried her to her bed.
Lia: I'm going to go to Israel. No wait, I'll go to Africa. That's really far away.
Me: Lia, why are you angry?
Lia: Hmm, I don't know.
Me: Lay down by me.
Lia: No, I'm allergic to you. I can't touch you.
Me: That makes me sad that you would say that to me.
Lia (suddenly with a change of heart): You know what, I can be by you. I'm not allergic anymore. I won't go to Africa.
I then got a hug and all was well again--just like that. She is now asleep and the trip to Africa has been canceled. Thank goodness.
Todd told her if she got out of bed again she would get a spanking. This news sparked more frustration and she decided that she would just run away. She started gathering all of her "special" things, wrapped them up in a blanket and headed to the front door. It went like this:
Lia: I'm leaving this place.
Todd: Lia, you need to get back in your bed.
Lia: I'm leaving. You're not my dad. I'm going to Mexico
Todd: I would be really sad if you went to Mexico.
Lia: Well, I wouldn't be sad.
I then joined Todd in getting Lia to bed.
Me: Lia, it's time to sleep--you are very tired.
Lia: I'm not going to sleep all night.
I picked her up, carried her to her bed.
Lia: I'm going to go to Israel. No wait, I'll go to Africa. That's really far away.
Me: Lia, why are you angry?
Lia: Hmm, I don't know.
Me: Lay down by me.
Lia: No, I'm allergic to you. I can't touch you.
Me: That makes me sad that you would say that to me.
Lia (suddenly with a change of heart): You know what, I can be by you. I'm not allergic anymore. I won't go to Africa.
I then got a hug and all was well again--just like that. She is now asleep and the trip to Africa has been canceled. Thank goodness.
Friday, November 6, 2009
today on the subway
As I was getting on the subway today a very kind elderly man was worried that I had a seat. Our conversation went like this:
Man: "You sit here."
Me: "Jeongja. one stop. no problem."
Man: "oh, Jeongja. where are you from?"
Me: "United States."
Man: "I've been to united states 5 times. where in united states?"
Me: "Missouri/Kansas." (I didn't say, Chicago.)
Man: "Do you know sad news about Texas today?"
Me: "Yes, I heard the news today. It's very sad."
Man: "It is terrible news. Very, very sad. I'm sorry."
We continued to talk until my stop in Jeongja. I appreciate moments like this. I appreciate having a conversation when so often I'm unable to and yet long to. I appreciate that though this world seems so big, it's really very small. I appreciate that though our cultures are very different, we both recognize the tragedy of the human heart and the brokenness that we live in. I appreciate his concern for a people he does not know and his reaching out to me to share that.
Man: "You sit here."
Me: "Jeongja. one stop. no problem."
Man: "oh, Jeongja. where are you from?"
Me: "United States."
Man: "I've been to united states 5 times. where in united states?"
Me: "Missouri/Kansas." (I didn't say, Chicago.)
Man: "Do you know sad news about Texas today?"
Me: "Yes, I heard the news today. It's very sad."
Man: "It is terrible news. Very, very sad. I'm sorry."
We continued to talk until my stop in Jeongja. I appreciate moments like this. I appreciate having a conversation when so often I'm unable to and yet long to. I appreciate that though this world seems so big, it's really very small. I appreciate that though our cultures are very different, we both recognize the tragedy of the human heart and the brokenness that we live in. I appreciate his concern for a people he does not know and his reaching out to me to share that.
Monday, November 2, 2009
6 days with Ray-Ray, Part Two
Check out Flicr to see pictures! The link is on the right side of the blog.
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