day 148. 2015

3 Gifts of Work

1. Provision. Though I have known provision with and without work, I am grateful for our jobs.

2. The value of starting a job and seeing it through. Completing a job that I know I have worked hard and given my best.

3. Ownership. Responsibility. This seems to me to be a gift. When I have a sense of ownership and responsibility in my job, I do my very best. I stay present and see my work as a reflection of who I am.

The past 4 years I have been a teacher's aide. It's not my dream job or what I envisioned myself doing but it's where I have felt I should be so I have stayed. I tried leaving once and well, that didn't go so well. There are days I have dreaded going to work. There have been days I have felt like there is no reward in what I am doing. It doesn't feel prestigious or of great value. I'm the aide. The assistant. And then . . .  I have a sweet interaction with a student, bring encouragement or correction and connect in some way and it all feels worth it. I get to serve the teacher I work with and help her do what she is called to do. In those moments I remember I just need to be faithful to serve and do what's been put in my hands to do.

One day as I walking my class to the lunchroom and dreading what lunch can sometimes bring, I heard these words, "Follow Me." I repeat those words often, Jesus, I am following You to work today. I am following You in this conversation. I am following You to the lunchroom and to recess and to the nurses office and as I sit and grade papers. Help me to Love and Serve and Give that You might be known. You lead well and are good and kind and compassionate. I will Follow YOU.

PROM
Tonight was Prom. Zach met up with all of his friends for pictures and dinner before dancing the night away. Half way through all the pictures my camera broke. My new camera. I was crushed. Thankfully, we figured out what is wrong and the problem can be 

day 147. 2015

A Gift at 8AM, 12PM, 8PM

1. Tea on the front porch with books and journal and birds and stillness. I am grateful for the slower pace of summer to linger through my mornings

2. Tie-dye with the Beairds. It was messy and fun. Thankful that the heavy rains held off until we were all finished.

3. Dinner with precious friends. Long conversation, encouraging words, challenges and new beginnings,tears and laughter.

day 146. 2015

3 Gifts Found in Church

1. Spiritual Family. Over the course of the last 28 years in my walk with Jesus, I have been part of three local churches. I have had spiritual Moms, Dads, Sisters, Brothers. There have been Grandparents to our kids and aunts and uncles. When I was in my early twenties I lived with a family from our church. They had 4 kids. Each week I learned how to cook and was loved on by this family.

2. Hope and Healing for the world. This is what Jesus said we would be. His people, loving, serving, caring and drawing, every nation, tribe and tongue, men and woman and children to Himself. The expression of His love and passion for the world is to be displayed through the church--His Body.

3. Corporate Worship. I put this because I love hearing the people of God adore and worship Him. It is powerful. Whether in small groups, 200-300 people or singing with 3,000 Koreans, worship is beautiful, experienced and powerful. We were made to worship and to know God and I believe one of the most profound experiences of that is corporate worship.

day 145. 2015

A Gift Worn, White, Whispered

1. My new pink running shoes. Slow and steady. Walk . . . Run . . . Walk . . . Run

2. White petals on flowers . . . the hummingbirds like both the red and white.

3. Lia whispers, "I feel like I need a hug. Lots of hugs today." Melt my heart.

day 144. 2015

3 Gifts from our 24th Wedding Anniversary

5.25.1991 

1. We have a story. A messy, beautiful story.

2. We still enjoy being with one another. I am thankful for this.

3. Becoming one is a process. We rehearsed our 24 years together. We reflected on the hard, painful ones and the years that seemed easy. Some years were challenging and yet rich because we grew in patience and faith--together. We have wounded one another and forgiven one another. We have encouraged and cheered one another on and have said things that we wish would have never left our mouths. We have laughed, cried and sat in complete silence together and have felt safe, comfortable and known.

I married a very good man. A faithful, kind, generous, patient, wise, lover of Jesus and people, man. A man who has shown me kindness and forgiveness and patience. I hope we get at least another 24 years.

We celebrated our anniversary twice this weekend. Saturday evening we went out for a nice dinner at 1111. The restaurant is newer to Columbia but the Chef has been around Columbia for awhile. When we read the little bio about 1111 we realized that the Chef was the same Chef at the restaurant that Todd was going to ask me to marry him. The tables were so close that Todd was a little nervous to ask such a personal question with people sitting just a couple of feet from us. In his nervousness he asked me on the corner of 9th and Walnut under the light post. It was the perfect spot. The corner is still there though the restaurant has long been gone. We thought it was cool that the Chef was now going to prepare our 24th wedding anniversary meal.

In case you want to know Todd had steak with grilled asparagus and I had grilled sea bass with roasted potatoes. It was delicious.

Our second celebration was at the Rooftop in downtown COMO. We shared a couple of appetizers and enjoyed the view of our beautiful little city.

On our way to 1111 to celebrate 24!

Rooftop on Broadway

My guy.

day 142 & 143. 2015

day 142

3 Gifts of Community

1. Sharing in the joys and sufferings of life. Not just the good but the good, the bad and the ugly. Life is full of each and we can share in both through community.

2. Being loved and loving others. It's a powerful gift to be known and loved and to love another when it cost time, resources, sacrifices and your own way being laid down.

3. Forgiveness and healing. I don't believe these happen in their fullness outside of community.

day 124

A Gift in a Plate, Pot, Package

1. A plate full of greens and veggies from the Farmer Lady, Debbie.

2. Pretty flowers planted.

3. I'm waiting for a package to arrive from Sierra Trading. I ordered a couple of items for our trip to Seattle. I love receiving packages in the mail. Even the ones I know about.

I'm adding this picture because Shakespeare's has been part of the COMO community for a very long time. The downtown location will be torn down and rebuilt. There should be a petition signed to stop this from happening.

Add caption

Lucy from Strawberry Hill Farms helped me choose the plants for this pot. She was so kind and passionate about helping me. Every morning I get to enjoy these beautiful arrangements.

day 141. 2015

3 Gifts That Made You Laugh

1. 6th grade year in review. We watched the slide show that I put together for the 6th graders to celebrate our last day of school. There was a lot of laughter and tears and hugs. What a great group of kids. I will miss their silliness and quirky sense of humor and hugs.

2. End of the Year Staff Lunch. When you put a bunch of teachers and school staff together to share stories from the year things get a little crazy. You can tell we all need a summer break. We're a little delirious. In all the laughter you know there were struggles and challenges and days when we all wondered if we could press on. The CFS staff is amazing and committed to one another and to the students. I'm grateful to partner with each of them.

3. My Super-Woman outfit for the annual Kickball Tournament. Ridiculous and yet so Awesome.

Today was the last day of school. It was the last day of 5th grade for Lia. The last day of 10th grade for Zach. Oh how they are growing up! I want them to grow and mature and experience new things but I also want them to just stop! I am savoring each day. Even the challenging ones because there will be a day when Lia's stuff want be strung throughout the house and Zach won't be eating every couple of hours and going through a couple gallons of milk every week. Pause. Listen. Slow down. Pay attention. Be present. Life goes by so quickly.

I am grateful for the rhythm of summer. I am grateful that there is now homework tonight or test tomorrow. I'm grateful for slower mornings and catching up on laundry and cleaning the bathrooms and grilling out and have a cold beer from time to time.

Summer, I am glad you are here. But please be kind and don't get hot and humid just yet.

day 140. 2015

3 Gifts from Little People

1. Little people have imagination and creativity.

2. Little people are usually free and open with their love. They typically don't judge and our honest.

3. Little people make you laugh and not take yourself too seriously.

These kiddos aren't so little but they sure were a lot of fun to work with this year. Love these 6th graders!

day 139. 2015

3 Gifts from this Day

1. A full afternoon of AT interviews. I love hearing stories of how people come to the decision to pursue going abroad to teach English.

2. Celebrating our friend, Rie. Rie recently took a painting class with a local artist. The class had a art show at a local gallery. Rie's work is beautiful. I love the risk, vulnerability and freedom that Rie found in stepping out to paint. It inspires me to explore areas of creativity that I'm usually too afraid to try.


 3. I began to work on the end of the year video for the 6th graders. What a transformation they make throughout the school year. I am weary and looking forward to summer break but I love these amazing kids. I'm grateful for the opportunity to watch them grow.

day 138. 2015

3 Gifts from Childhood

1. Going to my Grandparents home on Wyoming Street. My sisters and I spent a lot of time with our Grandparents growing up. Hugh and Catherine cared for and supported our family through so much. Easter egg hunts, Christmas plays with the cousins, feeding the birds with stale bread, Holy Water, grapefruit, Cardinals baseball on the radio with Jack Buck, Grandpa sitting on the porch each time we drove up, Christmas Eve, laughter, Tinkerbell.

2. Summer camp at Camp Wyman. Every summer I spent 11 days at camp. It was my dream to live there for my whole life. When I was old enough I was offered a job and was able to spend the entire summer at camp. It really was a dream come true.

3. Basketball at the school playground. I loved basketball. I played every chance I could.

Today was our first farm pick up. Friends introduced us to this wonderful family that has farm to table business. We are on the every other week drop off. Today we received, radishes, spinach, Chinese cabbage, strawberries, kale, lettuce and green onions. It's going to be a good summer! 

Chinese Cabbage. The size of my head.

Farm Day Bounty.

A great way to take a study break. A game of catch with Dad. 

day 137. 2015

3 Unexpected Gifts

1. Lunch on the patio with a friend. We were at a Mexican restaurant. The sweet older woman who brought us water only speaks Spanish. I remember a few words from Spanish class in 1985. Her smile was warm and kind. We exchanged our greetings and she put her arm around me and gently patted my back. A little unexpected treasure in my day.

2. A phone call from my friend Kimmy Sue. She lives in Chicago. I was surprised to get a call in the middle of the day. What a special treat! She just wanted to say hello and catch me up on exciting things happening in her life.

3. Two sweet little barn swallows are trying to build a nest on our porch. It's not a good spot for a nest but it's wonderful to see how diligent they are to work and protect their space. I now have a dilemma of what to do about these sweet little birds and their nest.

day 136. 2015

A Gift in a Box, A Bag, A Book

1. I was thinking about how many uses you can get from a box. Whether small or large and with a little imagination, you can fly an airplane, have a hideout, created a robot, hide secret treasures, collect baseball cards or store pictures. My kids have done all of the above. A box is a wonderful gift. Who needs to buy toys!

2. My bag of Endangered Species Dark Chocolate with Cranberries and Almonds. A simple, delicious treat!

3. "Love is holy because it is like grace--the worthiness of the object is never really what matters." 
" This morning a splendid dawn passed over our house on its way to Kansas." John Ames, Gilead

I watched these hummingbirds a lot today. They have been feasting at this feeder all day.
A few times they were a bit stingy and didn't want to share and would chase one another off. 

days 134 & 135. 2015

day 134

3 Gifts About You

1. The scar below my left eye. When I was three years old I was standing on a chair stretching to look out the window when the chair shifted below me. I fell and landed on a soda bottle. It left a pretty bad cut and my first black eye.

2. Approachable.

3. I am Yours and You are Mine. I woke up with a million thoughts racing through my mind. I made my tea, sat in my quiet spot and tried to quiet my thoughts. Nothing. My mind continued to race and I struggled to focus. This went on for about 20 minutes. I asked the Holy Spirit to help me because I was about to give up. He said, "Put your book down and get out your pen." So I did. I sat for several moments and that phrase, I am Yours and You are Mine began to play over and over in my mind. For the next 15 minutes that was the only thought in my mind. I then wrote it over and over in my journal and the truth of the words began to bring strength, comfort and rest to my soul. All I needed to do was to ask the Helper for Help. He is faithful and ready to answer.

day 135

3 Gifts Found in His Word

1. God is our refuge and strength, A very present help in trouble, Therefore we will not fear. Psalm 46:1

2. Now the Lord is Spirit; and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty. 2 Corinthians 3:17

3. There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus . . . Romans 8: 1

Our friend Anna from Kansas City was here with us this weekend. Thankful for our continued friendship with this beautiful lady. I'm thankful for the time she takes to be with our family. The weekend felt slow and easy and restful. We enjoyed good food, good conversation and one of my favorite films, Babbet's Feast.

day 133. 2015

A Gift Picked UP, Put Away, Put Back

1. Today at lunch someone dropped a whole bowl of croutons on the floor but didn't pick them up. I addressed the class responsible asking that whoever made the mess to please clean it up. No one of course would admit to the mess. I tried to encourage them that no one was in trouble, it just needed to be cleaned up. Still nothing. Really? Ugh! Then one sweet little fellow came up and said, "I don't mind cleaning it up Mrs. Stewart." He didn't make the mess.

2. Dishes. I was emptying the dishwasher and putting dishes away and thought, "I am so grateful for this dishwasher!" We didn't have a dishwasher for 5 years and I was perfectly fine without one but having the convenience is sure wonderful.

3. This should read: Put Back Together. Todd and Zach were moving a table but decided to keep everything on it including my sweet little bird bookends while they moved it. All was well until they sat it down and the bookends fell off and broke. Thankfully, the sweet little birds were glued back on and all is well.


Today it rained. Hard, steady rain at times. As dinner time approached the clouds began to break forming large, fluffy, rolling clouds across the sky. In the distance it looked like Missouri suddenly had a mountain range. The sun kissed the rain soaked plants in our small garden. I picked our first ripe strawberries and shared with Lia and Landon.

As the sun was setting this evening Lia said, "Mom, if you want to see something beautiful, follow me!" And so I did.

A good way to end this 133rd day of 2015.

day 132. 2015

3 Gifts Found in My Mom

1. Compassion.

2. Perseverance.

3. Courage.

Happy Mother's Day, Momma! Wow! Sometimes when I think of how you navigated being a Mom through the trials and challenges we faced, I'm undone by your courage, strength and love. Thank you, Momma! I am thankful for how you showed us three girls how to love others regardless of their place in life or circumstances, how to work hard and give your best even if it's difficult. You are a cheerleader, encourager and faithful woman. I love you!

Dad and Mom with their girls. 

My Mom with her lifelong friend, Joyce.

Surprise party for Mom's 65th birthday. 

day 131. 2015

3 Gifts Held in Hand Today

1. Gilead. The past two weeks have been so busy. I have had little time to finish Gilead. Today while I waited at my allergy appointment I had 30 minutes of uninterrupted time to read.

2. My watering can. My small green water can helps me care for all my potted plants.

3. My new camera strap for my new camera. I ordered a camera strap and it arrived today.

Here are a few pictures from 5D. I'm very much in the, "getting to know you" state. I've been wrestlingwith working from the manual setting but it's not going so well. More practice.

Lia didn't want her picture taken.

Darlin was searching online for a manual I could print off. He's a good one!

Our sweet little strawberry patch is producing a lot of strawberries. I'm sure we can eat some by the end of the week.

day 130. 2015

3 Gifts from my Parents

1. The gift of compassion towards others. Embracing people regardless of circumstances, places in life or ethnicity.

2. The gift of working hard, giving your best and finishing your job well.

3. Respect. This was a huge one in our home.

My parents both worked hard through a lot of difficult times. I am thankful for their perseverance, sacrifices and love for my sisters and I. They have cheered for us, encouraged, cried with, celebrated with each of us through a lot of life's ups and downs. Thank you, Dad and Mom!

day 129. 2015

A Gift Outside, Inside, Upside Down

1. There are so many outside gifts from today. Gilead while sipping tea on the patio, the sound of rain, bees, grilled scallops, strawberry patch, birds, blue and grey sky, conversation, freshly mowed grass, pretty flowers. 

2. Lunch around the table with Rie, Todd, Zach and Lia. Thankful for each of their presence in my life.

3. I feel a little upside down trying to figure out my new camera. It arrived Thursday and I've been wrestling with it all afternoon. I need patience.

Today is Mother's Day. There were many, many Mother's Days that were painful for me as I longed to be a Mom. The long wait, delay, loss and uncertainty were challenging and painful to navigate. I would often skip church or come late and leave early. I would attend baby showers to celebrate friends and leave grieving my loss and delay. When I found out I was pregnant with Zach those days and years seemed to fade. Every Mother's Day I think of the waiting and who else might be experiencing the same pain and uncertainty that I walked through. Most of us experience an unfulfilled longing or dream and if that's you today, my heart aches with yours whatever that longing may be. The ONE who sees and knows you is not aloof to you or your circumstances. He has HOPE and GRACE for your today and tomorrow and the day that follows. He will draw near to you in your grief and frustration and bring comfort, joy and life. Fear not, you are not alone. The One who rescues and saves will also provide all that you need.

My two miracles. Thankful I get to be their Mom.

This guy! He makes me a better Mom. Love him so very much.

day 128. 2015

3 Gifts Found in the Dark

1. Fireflies. Nothing says a summer night like fireflies.

2. A dark night sky and thousands of stars.

3. Campfire. I love being around a campfire on a dark summer evening.

I think I'm ready for a camping trip. Each of these gifts remind me of camping and I'm on a mission to camp this summer. We will kick off our summer with a trip to Seattle to attend a friends wedding. We are camping on a island just outside of Seattle. I. Can't. Wait.

Today I went to Strawberry Hills Farm to buy flowers. A very sweet lady, Lucy, helped me choose plants and flowers for a big pot I wanted to use for our back patio. There is a hummingbird that has a flight path through our yard and I want flowers to attract the hummer. I got my hands dirty, enjoyed the day outside in the rain and had a good porch sit to end the day.

I also helped Lia clean her room today. I texted a friend and said, "I'm being conformed more into the image of Christ helping Lia clean her room." It's done and we both survived.

The strawberries have become to bloom. Hooray!